The screen door on the old farm-house slammed shut. Shouting for Grandma, I ran in, breathless. I had been on a tramp in the woods and was reporting in. My parents were on vacation and I was privileged to come to the country. I loved the quiet and I thought of it as my special place in the whole world.
Grandma and Grandpa listened to the radio every night which played the Lone Ranger and the Bohemian Band. We would listen or play cards at night before we would go to bed. I can still see the small parlor with the dining room table, shining wood cabinets with glass doors, and the african rosewood clock with a pendulum that chimed on the hour. It was alive with love and activity.
When I would walk down the lane, just beyond the bridge, a choke cherry tree would have fragrant blooms in early spring. The finger shaped blossoms mesmerized me. At the base of the tree, the dirt of the lane was a soft sandy texture unlike any that I have ever felt since. At the flat wooden bridge that connected the lane to the farm buildings, I would sit down, dangle my feet over the side and watch the dark green moss waving in the crystal clear water just above the pebbles and gravel on the bottom. iridescent shimmery blue and black dragon flies darted around the wispy blossoms shooting up from the moss. It was a time to reflect on the beauty of God’s creation.
This is where I first knew God’s voice. It wasn’t strong but he spoke to me in several ways. There were things that he showed me about who I was and that I couldn’t be anyone else; that the people in the world had lives of their own and that they didn’t just start into motion when I entered the room. (Talk about being self-centered!) He showed me things about my future and about the nature around me. He taught me faithfulness through Stubby, our collie dog. It was the sweet, innocent times of a child. It was peace and discovery.
Today, I am learning to feel God’s presence within me. Yes, I did say feeling. When the Scriptures speak of the heart, it is the Holy Spirit’s Presence within you because of having accepted Jesus’ finished work. This feeling is like an inner hug and goosebumps. Father speaks to my heart. He comforts, confronts, instructs and encourages me. I am learning to know Him face-to-face. I close my eyes and find myself in the heavenly throne room where Father dwells in unapproachable light – except I can approach Him, because I belong to Him.
For a long time, I was afraid to draw near because there were things in my life I wasn’t ready to release, but it was a foolish fear. When I drew near to Him, He drew near to me and welcomed me. The sin fell off of me the closer I got to Him and I entered into His love. I was warm, protected, sheltered and loved. He wasn’t mad at me. He knew that I couldn’t do it without Jesus and so He provided a Way to Life and Life more abundantly.
Being at the Farm was the best I could do here on the earth, but there is nothing that compares with what the Father opens to me, when I open my heart. I just surrender and say, “I blew it! Help!” He just gathers me up in His arms and holds me.
Won’t you draw near? Visualize Him and walk through the door – Jesus Christ – He is the door. Without Him there is no way, but ask Jesus to come into your heart and the Way is open.
Tell me, can you hear God’s voice? Are you willing to draw near? Write to me and know that I will pray for you.
http://swimlifelessons.wordpress.com and look at the Happily Ever After Post
http://pliableheart.wordpress.com and look at Resurrecting Feelings
His feet were like burnished bronze, when it has been made to glow in a furnace, and His voice was like the sound of many waters.
Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. Cleanse your hands, you sinners; and purify your hearts, you double-minded.
let us draw near with a sincere heart in full assurance of faith, having our hearts sprinkled clean from an evil conscience and our bodies washed with pure water.
Therefore He is able also to save forever those who draw near to God through Him, since He always lives to make intercession for them.
Therefore let us draw near with confidence to the throne of grace, so that we may receive mercy and find grace to help in time of need.
Jesus *said to him, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life; no one comes to the Father but through Me.
Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.